i was going to make this episode about PRIORITIES, but while thinking about these priorities, i realized that i’ve neglected to check up on all of you.
it’s been a while since someone has asked me how i am. and considering the title of this podcast, i’m not really sure the last time i’ve asked how you all are doing, not just on the surface, in a superficial way.
but like, a full time sit down evaluation of ourselves, our mental health especially.
because there are a lot of things we can distract ourselves with, keeping up with our household and our bank account, the bills, eating well.
but the constant strain of these things shouldn’t have to be the reason you neglect yourself and your happiness.
i’m not saying throw away your television and live under a bridge because the real pain comes from money.
nah, that’s not even true. yes, mo money equals mo problems, but that’s only because we think that when we come into more money, we have to spend it all. and in come all the extra financial responsibilities.
many of the problems we have are created in our own heads, so sometimes we have to come through and clean that shit out, put things into perspective.
real perspective, not this woe is me attitude we sometimes have when our situation gets a bit hairy.
so i’m here to ask, hi, how are you?
and instead of replying, “good” because that’s the simplest go-to answer we can muster up, be honest and say, “well, i do got some shit going on.”
sometimes, in order to get past that wall, we have to look the wall in the face and say, “hey, you’re a pain in my ass right now, can you please get out of my way?”
maybe the wall was all in your head. maybe if you just ask the wall nicely, the wall will move.
sometimes, the wall will tell you, “if you give me a, i’ll give you b.”
which is pretty fucked up for a wall to blackmail your happiness like that, but if you change your perspective from victim mode for two seconds, you may find that the wall has very simple demands.
number one, the wall says, “i ain’t really that big of a wall to begin with.”
when the wall says that, first, you wonder if that portabello mushroom was actually psilocybin.
second, the wall seems a little less intimidating, no? probably small enough to parkour off a nearby wall and scale that bitch vertically.
and also, the wall looks a little bit like you, and who the fuck would be afraid of you?
you wonder, what was i so scared of? if i take a few seconds and actually look the wall in its dead, wall eyes, i can see the wall isn’t even as strong as i thought it was when it first popped up out of nowhere.
this wall is falling apart, crumbling. maybe you think, if i just… douse this wall with water or take a few nice sturdy kicks to it, the whole thing might just collapse.
but if it doesn’t, at least you’re chipping away slowly and able to see the other side of the wall for what it is – the continuation of this journey where shit happens and we simply overcome it because, what other choice do you have?
listen, the moral of the story is, you need to ask yourself how you’re doing.
because many times, we don’t even realize that our stress levels are rising, that we’re being tested by our own worst enemy – ourselves.
sincerely sit down and ask yourself, “how am i doing?”
and don’t say “good” because that’s the same cop out answer you give to people you don’t want to have a conversation with.
be real with yourself and whatever your struggles are so you can face them and tackle them.
don’t wait for these struggles to sneak attack you, and then you’re like me, crying on the floor because you broke your stupid piano like a giant 30-something year old boss baby.
hi, how are you?
well, i’m a bit stressed right now, but what’s new.
at least the bills are paid on time, i can still put money aside, and i don’t currently have a fear of homelessness.
at least i can eat, and i have a soft place to lie my head tonight.
i have a family who may not be able to help me but they’re a support system.
at least i’m healthy for now. at least i am working.
okay so i broke my keyboard, either die without it or get a new one, but make a decision.
crying isn’t gonna bring my keyboard back. unless my tears are made of glue and can paste the circuit board back together.
boohoo i can’t travel. well, neither can anybody else.
and these people actually have mortgages and children, a very impressive decision to not have these as a hispanic woman.
some days, i’m tired, but the world is tired, isn’t it?
that’s part of the simulation, humans get tired. whoever is running my save file right now is clearly bored with their time, and the same way i used to put my sims in one bedroom, add a stove and remove the door, my current overlord is like, “let’s see, pandemic, killer bees, protesting, police brutality, pedos in hollywood, rampant racism, hurricane season.
what’s next, hunger games-themed election?
whatever it is that is causing you headache, heartache, bodyache, let it go and let’s keep moving. we still have responsibilities that we have to be held accountable to, regardless of what kind of day we’re having.
as long as you remember this is a temporary feeling, a passing cloud, then you will be fine.
welp, sorry for taking so long with this one. the sun rises every morning and sets every night without asking me, so time got out of hand.
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if you need a kick in the butt, i’m good at that.
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all right, we’ll catch up next time i drop an episode, accountabilibuddies. thanks for listening.